New American Flag

As a bit of an amateur vexillologist (Google it)I’ve always had a bit of mixed feelings about the US flag, the Star Spangled Banner, the Stars and Stripes, Old Glory… Sure it’s my country’s flag but seriously, we couldn’t have done better? The yellow “Don’t tread on me” flag is far better in my opinion.

So I’ve decided to start a national campaign to design a new Old Glory. For inspiration I’ve compiled a list of some of the best (and worst) flags from around the world.

The best flags are bold and stirring, they just kind of look like they should be flying in front of a conquering army. The worst are so complex they can only be drawn by DaVinci, or they look like they were drawn by DaVinci’s mentally handicapped 5 year old nephew Herbert.

Coolest Flags

#20 Kyrgyzstan

Striking red with a funky sun in the center, strong enough for #20

#19 Barbados

 I'm not sure if Barbados is a county or a superhero but the trident makes this a fairly cool flag

#18 Kazakhstan

In case you're wondering where you've seen this flag before, it was Borat.

#17 Moldova

It's not the fanciest flag around, but it looks like it could be painted on a knight's shield and that is pretty cool

#16 Scotland

Simply using the St Andrew's cross give it a bit of that bad ass feel

#15 Macedonia

So Japan's flag during WWII was pretty cool, lets do something like that.

#14 North Korea

Sure Kim Jong Il is a nutcase but that's a pretty decent flag

#13 Israel

Simple, bold, and no doubting who you are

#12 Estonia

Yes that Estonia home of Encino Man. Not exciting, I just really like the color choices.

#11 Taiwan

I'd may not know good flag from bad but I know what I like and this I like, and I'm not really sure why

#10 United Kingdom

Would any other flag look so good on an album cover?

#9 South Korea

No other flag says "you're about to get kicked in the face like the South Korean flag does

#8 Kenya

Spears and a shield also looked pretty cool on the pair of Motumbo Reeboks I had in high school

#7 Saudi Arabia

My Arabic is a little rusty but I'm pretty sure that says "Mess with us and we'll cut ya!"

#6 Vietnam

This flag says "We've got better things to do with our time than sitting around coming up with ideas for flags"

You don't get points for creativity

#5 Albania 

Two headed demon eagle, why ruin it with anything else?

#4 Angola

Great colors and a frickin' machete!

#3 Bhutan

Dragon = Win

#2 Wales

A more better dragon, ready to burninate your enemies

#1 Mozambique

Yes that is an AK-47 on their flag, and that is why Mozambique has the coolest flag in the world

Runners Up

Canada

Hey that's a pretty cool flag, what is that in the center? A star? An eagle? Nope it's a frickin leaf. Nice try Canada.

Bosnia and Herzegovina

What's with that extra bit of blue at the end? Looks like someone forgot to align the printer.

Hong Kong

Learn from Canda's mistakes. Think less flora and more flaming dragon of war, with an AK-47

Worst flags in the word

#10 Grenada

I think they really need to be invaded again


#9 Isle of Man

As if "Isle of Man" was a creepy enough name for the country then they go and put a three legged, no bodied monster on the flag. 


#8 Italy

Ok sure lot's of other countries has simple tricolor flags, but come on this is Italy home of the Roman empire. They could throw a sword or eagle or vomitorium on there somewhere?


#7 Lebanon

Sure you're country used to have trees in it. And even Solomon spit some sexy rhymes about them, but all this flag says to me is Christmas. And somehow I don't think you see it that way.


#6 Seychelles

This isn't a flag, it's an ad for degergant


#5 Turkmenistan

Confusing your country's flag with the blanky your gama quilted you is not a good thing.

#4 Tokelau

"Come to Tokelau, we've got giant piss tsunamis"


#3 Indonesia, Monaco, Poland

Seriously, those are three different flags. Some points would be awarded for some creativity

#2Libya

Lazy


#1 Guam

If that's the best art your country can produce maybe Libya is on to something after all.

Hopefully you've been inspired, submit your own ideas for a new US flag here or email them to me at timothyareeder@gmail.com and I will post the top submissions in a future blog.